Fur On Scales #1 – Paws Or Maws?

Ever since I got asked to be a member of contributors to the articles on AwooNews, I’ve wanted to do opinion stuff. Time to draw a line and pick a side, everyone. Paws … or Maws?

However, this won’t be a regular opinion article. I believe in the fairness of both sides, so I’ll be looking at each point in a balanced manner. It’ll be up to you, if you wish, to decide which side you are on.

So with that, welcome to Fur On Scales, and our first topic is a VERY important question.

Paws or Maws? Grab or Snap? Poking or Licking? Stro– well, you get the idea. LET’S FIND OUT!

Point 1: Looks

So first off, how do they look? Well, paws are interesting things. I may not have any myself, being an eagle, but from what I’ve heard and seen, they look cool! They vary in fingers apparently, and they have little pink pads that give them extra grip! Too bad they’re mostly pink because it means trolls can make fun of the fact that we’re “girly”. Well, guess what, I HAVE POINTY CLAWS. Suck it!

Speaking of sucking, the maw is another interesting looking feature. Again, I don’t have one myself, but hey, having good looking teeth makes you freaking attractive! All a good paw can do is show off a good gesture to someone else. Then again, maws can also be scarier than a paw. Being on your face means it’s one of the main things others see, so it’s a big part in judging someone else. So if your maw looks like it can eat you in one gulp, you are probably going to scare others away.

But can we really say that depending on what position the paw and maw are in? Thumbs up and a smile is nice. A fist and a frown aren’t. Though admittedly, the maw needs the rest of the face in order to show the full story. All a fist needs is itself. How independent.

Point 2: Function

So what can these things do? Well, they’re both good in a fight, but the paw can do multiple positions to hurt someone in different ways. All a maw can do is open and close to bite. Plus, it’s more fragile, and you only have one. What are you gonna do if your only maw can’t fight? Call for help? Viable, if you have someone to aid you. Otherwise, commando up, weakling.

However, on the more casual side, paws are good at picking up stuff. Sure it needs the body if it’s big, but if it’s small enough, and if you’re strong enough, you can pick it up. The maw doesn’t have that strength. It’s more like 2 trap doors. With the tongue as a ladder, I guess.

But while the maw isn’t as strong, it IS used to talk to others, is one method of breathing, AND is used to eat and drink the stuff that helps us stay alive, so that’s something I guess. Then again, if paws weren’t on hand (heh heh, puns), we would be eating and drinking from off the ground. And THAT is disgusting. (No offense to anyone who does that)

There IS another function for paws and maws, but I’ll leave THAT to when I’m allowed my own… MATURE section to write about it.

Point 3: Maintenance

So how do you keep these in check? Well, with paws, they’re in charge of grabbing anything you need, and you don’t know what they’ve been in or touched! So, it’s recommended to wash them whenever you cook, socialize, or do hospital stuff, with soap and water, or hand sanitizer. Make sure to get between the fingers and the BACK of your paws!

Maws are slightly less repetitive but are slightly more complicated. It’s recommended to brush with a toothbrush and floss after each meal, or at least every morning or night. I won’t give all the steps though, just ask your dentist. All I can say is, you’ll need your paw to get the toothbrush into your maw!

Beware if you don’t maintain them. You’ll either contaminate your food or friends depending on what you touch, or you’ll gross out everyone around you when you open your mouth.

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Point 4: Pain

How much pain will be caused if these are damaged? Well, that depends on the tactics of the one hurting you. Paws may be tougher in more places, but it’s Achilles heel is its fingers. Each one isn’t hard to break given enough pressure, and depending on how many you have, that’s more fresh pain for each break!

But maws? They can end up as a WHOLE different story. They have TEETH. Have fun standing up to your captives if they decide to damage each tooth individually. Most likely they’ll just punch it though, so that’ll at least speed it up. More bloody though. Yuck.

Not much more to say on that. Moving on.

Point 5: Huh?

Why is this even a hot topic? Well, it’s the same reason for… chests or rears. Everyone has a different favorite body part. So it’s good to get together and talk about it. I mean, hey, it brings others together, so what’s the harm?

And those who say it’s a stupid thing to focus on? Simply put, they see this topic and think there’s more important stuff to focus on. True, but that’s not the point. Something doesn’t have to be IMPORTANT to talk about it. It just needs to get people talking.

Final Thoughts

Overall, these may be just features on us, but they both have their purposes. They have their weaknesses and maintenance, but they will help us to survive and build a new, better future.

I would have them shake, but I REALLY don’t want to know how they would do that. Ewww.

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Written by SuperSniperEagleMan

Sup! My name's Ryan T, aka SuperSniperEagleMan. I'm an Australian who likes YouTube, has seen the darker parts of the internet, acts crazy, and always has a sense of anxiety and loneliness.

Oh yeah, I also write stuff! Fanfic, rap battles, original stuff, articles, etc. I can also make videos. My detailed and imaginative mind can't be beat!